Thursday, October 25, 2007

My Fiance's Toast

LAPD Rampart station.

Yes, officer, I need to report stolen toast.

Stolen toast?

Yes. My fiance asked me to make her peanut butter toast.

Peanut butter toast??

Yes, she has that every morning. It's very important.

Sir--

And it's gone. I went to check on it, and the toaster is empty. No obvious signs of forced entry.

Sir--

If you can just send someone quick. My fiance is in the bathroom getting ready for work. If she comes out and there's no toast, I'm going to get clobbered; but if I can at least tell her that police are on the job--

Sir. Your fiance took the toast and did it herself.

She did?

You were reading the news and didn't even notice her walk into the kitchen and spread peanut butter on her own toast.

Oh. Is that right?

You'd better believe it.

You're really good at what you do, aren't you?

Quick, buddy, go and ask her if she needs anything else. Call me back if there's trouble.

Thanks, I'm new at this.

I know.

1 comment:

Hal Johnson said...

HA! Priceless.