Friday, August 01, 2008

Auto Mechanics Have A Known Liberal Bias

...and I am beginning to suspect the laws of physics as well.

A candidate for President (sssssh - it was the black one with the muslim-sounding name) pointed out that elementary auto maintenance, cutting back on the speeding, getting the oil changed and keeping those tires inflated to the right pressure, cuts down fuel consumption. If everyone in the nation were doing that on a regular basis, the difference in oil consumption would be, according to a fuel expert that ABC News spoke with, 800,000 barrels per day.

800,000 barrels a day. Not a bad thing - on top of encouraging people to take responsibility for their part of the consumption, and save themselves some money on top of it. Sounds like a message true conservatives would welcome.

Yet the attack machine is on that candidate like grease on an oil filter, pretending he said something he didn't and making fun of him. That uppity, swarthy, fist-bumping liberal terrorist. Oh, you say Republican governors have been saying the same thing in their home states, like California and Florida? Oh. Well. Hey, the GOP is a versatile political party. We can say sensible things and deny the same statement at our next campaign event. We can do this because the Democrats won't call us on it. If they called us on it, we would criticize them, and they are apparently very afraid of that. So we win.

H.L. Mencken would have loved this campaign. As he wrote in 1926: "I enjoy democracy immensely. It is incomparably idiotic, and hence incomparably amusing. Does it exalt dunderheads, cowards, trimmers, frauds, cads? Then the pain of seeing them go up is balanced and obliterated by the joy of seeing them come down. Is it inordinately wasteful, extravagant, dishonest? Then so is every other form of government: all alike are enemies to laborious and virtuous men. Is rascality at the very heart of it? Well, we have borne that rascality since 1776, and continue to survive. In the long run, it may turn out that rascality is necessary to human government, and even to civilization itself - that civilization, at bottom, is nothing but a colossal swindle. I do not know: I report only that when the suckers are running well the spectacle is infinitely exhilarating. But I am, it may be, a somewhat malicious man: my sympathies, when it comes to suckers, tend to be coy. What I can't make out is how any man can believe in democracy who feels for and with them, and is pained when they are debauched and made a show of. How can any man be a democrat who is sincerely a democrat?"

I wonder who worked on HIS car.

1 comment:

Kelly said...

These driving tips have been spouted for years... you just don't see many folks taking them to heart.

Love the Mencken quote!