Thursday, August 14, 2008

Bathroom Duty

Is this the job they give the new teachers?

I spend a couple of hours a day manning a "behavior station," providing instruction on appropriate conduct in certain common areas of the school. The behavior station to which I have been assigned is the boys' room. Teachers actually line up their classes in front of me, so that I can invite the boys to follow me into the bathroom.

Putting aside all the jokes about making the new guy do bathroom duty, it's an invaluable task, as any man who has had to use a public men's bathroom knows. Even at a prestigious legal firm where I once temped as the Assistant Lackey to the Third Underling, the bathrooms - utilized by prominent attorneys and a former Governor - were a catastrophe of paper towels and bad aim.

Certain things have to be addressed early - and repeatedly.

At times, while having the boys show me how they make a good line and wait patiently, the boys have taken an interest in my attire. My work uniform consists of a vest, pocket watch, and bow tie. They see the silver chain and want to know what I've got, so I show them my watch. It has met with widespread approval by the elementary school boys - and so has the bow tie, something most of them haven't seen before.

6 comments:

Elmak said...

Do we get to see a photo of this vest/pocket-watch/necktie ensemble?

Jane R said...

I was just going to ask same!

Hal Johnson said...

"My work uniform consists of a vest, pocket watch, and bow tie."

No trousers? Man, and I thought L.A. was permissive!

Pam said...

LOL! Hal!

I can just see you, Alg!

Ah, elementary school joys! That is my home away from home and where I sub on a regular basis (starting again in 2 weeks).

Wonders and laughs never cease in this age group of younguns!

Donna said...

Hal!! LOL!!

I also want to see a photo - with or without trousers - either way.

quid said...

Some day some guy will say to his wife... I had this teacher in grade school, turned out he had been a Buddhist monk and an actor in LA before he came to Santa Fe. What was really cool about him was that he had this thing for bow ties. Bow ties! And, it was the 21st century.

It's good to be someone's outstanding grade school memory. You'll be that, a lot. For a lot of reasons, nonetheleastofwhich is ...aforesaid bow tie.

quid